Monday, 19 March 2012

Who exactly is the 'Maga'?

*singing* "Maga don pay shout halleluyah, oooooo. Mugu don pay shout halleluyah."
When Kelly Handosme dropped that 'hit track' we all shook our booty to the beats. That was until some people started raising the question 'should anyone be happy and dance to making a 419 score?' Kelly Handsome immediately replied that he didnt mean the 'maga' in the 419 way. That he meant......... (cant even remember what silly explanation he gave at the time)
We all hear of 'mugus' that fall allowing 'guy man' to chop. These 'mugus' are actually people, humans like us, with blood running through their veins.
The video below made me cry.

In as much as we ridicle victims of internet scammers, calling them gullible, we should just take out time and try to understand what makes them give in to these scams and scammers.

These people have probably, been hurting, have been seeking love and comfort and a sense of belonging. They find 'answers' to their prayers online in the guise of a lovely looking guy/lady. They are happy - these scammers make them happy. Then they are put in the position where they think that they have a chance of making their 'dream man/woman' happy also - by giving them money (sometimes, their entire life savings + the one they borrow!)

They part with the money and that is it! Love + dream man/woman + money disappears, poof, into thin air.

These people are left broken physically, mentally psychologically etc. Some might even kill themselves.

Now, the scammers may think "No harm. i am not forcing them to give me anything. they gave me of their own free will. i am not a thief".
Bull Shit!!!
You are as much a thief as any daylight robber out there! You pretended to be someone you are not, and under these pretences you acquired from someone with no intentions whatsoever of keeping your end of the bargain. That is ROBBERY - short and simple. No difference from what our politicians do to us.

And look at the guy in the centre of all this - the Bidemi guy. Just a regular looking guy. But has probably used his ill-gotten, blood money to erect one outstanding structure in Lekki phase with girls falling over themselves for him. He had 81 other australian women in his contact list! People no just get fear of God honestly.

The last part of that video brought the most tears to my eyes.
Guy: ".......If you dont see the warts in their eyes, If they are not buying you a drink, Dont talk to them" 
Rosanne: "Noone buys me a drink, thats the whole problem"

Makes me wonder if the westerners actually have a point in not trusting Nigerians. *sigh*

Friday, 16 March 2012

Charly 'Man' Oputa - Mr Controversy

Born in 1951.
Set out to be a priest! (*looking around in utter shock*) But left seminary after a year.
A father of many and grandfather of some.
A controversial controversy.
Gay??? Dont know, cant say, dont ask me *smug face*

I present to you 'Charly Boy (abi man) "controversial" Oputa' AKA Area Fada!!!

This guy is just one truck load of controversy after the other!
From his numerous piercings to his numerous tattos to the numerous rings and jewelleries,to his bikes and biker club friends, to his 'kissing' of Denrele on the front page of entertainment magazines to ....................... (infinity)
I have actually been peeping at this picture above to see if he was actually naked. I have shone a torchlight 'in there' yet i cant seem to make out what i am seeing.

Please help me. Is that a naked pose of a father and grand father???

Monday, 12 March 2012

Chei! Which way Nigeria, which way to go?

I am sure that those born in the 80s remember that song "which way Nigeria, which way to go? I love my fatherland, i want to know...................." by Christy Essein (or so)

It is time again to ask that same question as was asked in that song "WHICH WAY NIGERIA????"

Recent headlines read thus:
"11 killed, several injured in Jos catholic church bomb blast" - Terrorism
"Gun men kill 3 in Kano state" - Terrorism
"Corpers die in road crash" - Poor planning and infrastructures
"Terrorist escapes arrest" - Negligence in high places
"Woman kidnapped....." - Terrorism
The list is just endless. When people die senselessly this way, all we hear is "The president sends condolence messages to the families of the deceased blah blah blah". Condolence messages???? What the hell does that mean?
I am so sad. So sad for the thousands of people who have died (who probably shouldnt have) due to the circumstances that could have been avoided. Due to the cluelessness of the people in power. Its so sad.
Are they (government) telling me that there is ABSOLUTELY NOTHING that can be done about this Boko Haram thing? Are they telling me that the roads have been cursed by our fore-fathers and so can never be repaired? Are they telling me that it will kill them to provide us with power and those other basics?

To people in government - Noone is saying 'do not steal'. All we are saying is 'steal well but do what you are supposed to do'. Is that too much to ask??? If you steal us blind but provide us with power, good roads, healthcare we will sing your praise till thy kingdom come. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?

I am just so sad, honestly. Why do they have special advisers if noone is advising anyone? Have they TOTALLY sold their consciences to the devil? Dont they feel anymore?
God has done what he should do for us as a people. He has blessed us bountifully - both with natural and with human resources. He gave us free will to use them well. We are mis-using them and calling on Him.

Hmmm, anyway, when all seems to be lost, its just natural to look upwards.

Cant we, as a people, do ANYTHING?

I am tired of sayin "RIP" to people who have died due to these negligences/avoidable circumstances. Now i will say to them "Before you rest in peace, please haunt ALL the people that did not do what they were meant to do which resulted in your death. Haunt them till they run mad!"

Which way Nigeria????

Thursday, 8 March 2012

Possesive and over-possesive partners.

Human beings just love to be loved. We, naturally, crave love and attention especially from people we love too. But sometimes, for some people, this love becomes extremely much!

I had this girl in the university. She just got out of a very abusive relationship before i met her. We used to exchange stories about boys and things. One day, she actually opened up to me, to tell me about her past relationship. Her boyfriend was over possessive. I thought that would show how much he loved her (hadnt really given the real meaning of that word a thought till then). She looked at me like an intelligent show-off student will look at a another student who just failed the recitation of 'Nigerian states and capitals' - with pity at my stupidity.
She started the story
Her boyfriend 'loved' her so much that he vowed NEVER to see her with another man. He strikes her anytime he sees her as much as talking to any male - he cries as he beats her. Asking her why she wants to break his heart! He feels bad at the closeness between her and her siblings - says she should love him more than her siblings as he seeks to make her his wife. The height - Anytime she goes out, to school or something,

*anyone under 18yrs should just stop reading here* hehehehe

he demands that she removes her underwear for him to check for the existence, or otherwise, of semen!!!

He has beat her on so many occasions cos he thought he saw something that looked like semen in her underwear. To say i was shocked beyond belief is just to put it mildly - Flabbergasted, will somehow explain how i felt at hearing this.
I also hear of girls that go through their boyfriend's phones and slam the fone on the wall anytime they see anything that remotely links the bf to another girl. They monitor the guy's movements and sometimes trail him to make sure he is going where he says he is going. They make sure they have all his friends' fone numbers so they can call and find out if he is truely with them when he says he is.

Ol boy! People, sha, sabi worry themselves ooo.

Over possessiveness. Not healthy, Not safe. So if there is anyone out there who is doing something like this - STOP IT! It does not show you love the other person. It simply shows you have a very very low self esteem.

And if you are in a relationship with someone who is possessive - Run, Flee, Take Off - before that person chokes you (literally and figuratively) to death.


Friday, 2 March 2012

Lets talk surgery!

Cosmetic surgery, i mean.
We see and hear about people who have gone under the knife for breast implants, hip enlargement, waist reduction, tummy tuck, face lift, nose jobs etc (ol boy, the things dem plenty ooo)
Now, there are so many people in this parts, who immediately criticize such people whenever they hear such things. I remember in 2005 when the news of the death of the then 1st lady filtered in. People were quite sad at first for her death until it was known that she died as a result of complications arising from a cosmetic surgery gone wrong. 

Come and see the spitting of venom.

A lot of people thought she deserved it "since she didnt want to grow old". That she would have been alive "if she had kept herself the way God made her". Made me wonder.
Now i ask "what exactly is wrong with having a cosmetic surgery"?
I mean what's the difference between having a sugery to make ur waist smaller and wearing a magic suit to do the same thing? Aside from the fact that the former is more expensive and kind of more permanent?
Is it the danger involved in these surgeries that make people castigate the lovers of this trade?
Ladies fix eyelashes, trim eyebrows, wear body magic that leaves no room for breathing yet once we hear someone had her face lifted, we sound the war drums and take the fight to the person's backyard.
I asked my aunty, that period Stella Obasanjo died, a question. I said to her "aunty, if i offer to pay for you to have your tummy fat removed surgically (she was always complianing of her big tummy and her laziness at exercising) will you do it?" She couldnt give me a straight reply.

So does it mean its lack of money that makes us view cosmetic surgery as a sin or is it just bad?

I dont have any intentions whatsoever of having any, by the way.

Thursday, 1 March 2012

Nigeria's dumbest criminal!

I read this stroy and didnt know whether to cry or laugh.
How can someone be so evil and so stupid at the same time???
Please read:

A 30-years-old housewife, Rukayat Alalade, has been arrested by men of the Nigeria Police Force, Oyo State Command, for  macheting her 11 years old stepson to death.
It was gathered that the suspect, whose husband Lukman Alalade, married after he separated from his first wife, had always haboured ill-feelings for her two stepchildren.
According to sources, the dastardly act was committed on Valentine’s Day after the boy, identified as Qudus, returned from an errand on which his stepmother sent him. Angry that the boy was late in coming from where she sent him to buy kerosene, the suspect reportedly descended on him with a macheteShe reportedly cut him on the head and hand until he gave up the ghost.
After accomplishing her mission, Mrs. Alalade dragged the remains of the little boy to the backyard of the family’s building and hid the cutlass under the bed.
Her wicked deed was, however, blown open when the husband came back and could not see his son. Though she initially denied knowledge of the deceased’s whereabouts, a trail of his blood was followed to where his body was eventually discovered at the backyard. It was then that bloodstains were noticed on the woman’s clothwhile the cutlass was found under the bed in the couple’s room.
The suspect has been transferred to the State Criminal Investigation Department (SCID) for further investigations and prosecution.

I dont know which upsets me more - the fact that she was so demonic to another human being (her stepson) or the fact that she was a dumb ass demon.
I mean "drag the body to the backyard and hide the cutlass under the bed"? She should be charged with murder in the 1st degree as well as stupidity in the 1st degree! The 2 charges should get her spending the rest of her life in jail! Oshi!